Affirming my higher purpose


Throughout 2013 I contemplated on the meaning of my life and my purpose here.

I’m not quite at that stage where men usually have a midlife crisis, but I suppose I choose to have my crisis now and determine the course of my journey from hereon.

Before I could do that I needed to understand how I could live on purpose, and actually what that meant for me.

I drew wisdom from a few traditions, as well as the wisdom of Yogic philosophy. Here, Sally Kempton’s wisdom proved to be invaluable.

The text below describes my dharma/my calling/my higher purpose as I understand it at this point in my life.


By day and by night I remember my Higher

I dwell in Loving thought


With each moment I greet Compassion,

    In all places and times
I am present with Compassion


My gaze rests upon the horizons of Faith

    I focus beyond the veil of fear with a vision of Love


With quiet confidence, I choose Joy.

    I trust the sovereignty of Love to reign over my life


The depths of Gratitude anchors this vessel

    I maintain balance through practicing Gratitude


I discern though Divine

I am enlightened through my wisdom, the ancient teachings and my Soul


Courage is my steady companion in action

    I express myself honestly and whole-heartedly


I express my gifts with all my Heart

    I offer my unique gifts in service to Love



A moment




We have moments that are more splendid than the colours of the rainbow, and others which are heavier than the darkest of rain clouds. We have fleeting moments of chance, of opportunity and then there are those moments which feel like years spent wandering the thirsty Saharan desert. Some of our precious moments leave the scent of wild roses lingering in the air but we can all recall moments when fear sulled the very molecules of oxygen, as life itself seems to escape the confines of our skin and bones. Yet it is the meaning we give to each moment that somehow weaves the tapestry of the events, experiences and vitality of our lives.

Our responsibilities

A great reminder from Lena Stevens about what each of us is responsible for. It’s a long list, however awareness of our responsibilities and the undertaking of them takes practice.  You knew I was going to say that.




The stories of our lives

As autumn is showing signs of reappearing I am reminded of how change is prevalent in all things, and change doesn’t leave my life untouched.

Change in the forests of England, the crop now harvested and the Earth turned up again by the plow. A summer has passed and children are back in school. Office car parks fill up once more and the hamster will starts spinning faster. Ah, Autumn.

Yesterday a friend joined me for a days walk through the Ouse Valley. Only that this is someone I’ve met only 3 times in my life. You know when you meet someone for the first time and before a word is even exchanged you feel a strong bond already? This is how I feel with this friend. Perhaps it’s the story told through her eyes that means something to me somehow. Perhaps it’s her gentle smile and unassuming nature which touches my own soul, some part of me that perhaps I’ve neglected over the years. Such folk make great company for a long walk.

Anyone who has walk any part of the meandering Ouse Valley in Bedfordshire will have come across the picturesque villages which are dotted along the region and the wildlife reserves providing sanctuaries of peace to anyone who cares to rest there.

My friend talked of the changes in her life since we had last spoken 6 months before. She weaved these recent events in her life into a story where she was the main character and she was the author, and narrator. The significant changes she spoke of seem to give the context and a platform to apply herself in the world in a meaningful way, in a way which is true for her.

How story telling is a powerful device for moving through ones life with grace. Story telling offers time to reflect and give meaning to events, and adjust our sails to keep the ship sailing towards our destined paths. Giving meaning to life is a self-empowering gift because it helps us learn the lessons which may need to be learned, to atone for things we need to atone for and move on from them. Whilst in reflection we look at the good and bad, but giving meaning to the events in our lives requires us to give bias to the good in things so that we don’t get caught in muddy waters but rather we keep our energies in motion, moving towards our souls purpose.

It was a tough 26km walk and my water-proof boots failed to keep my feet dry as we trawled through muddy fields. She spoke of her plans to take a sabbatical from work next year as she thought of the decisions she will have to make after she finished her masters degree and some projects at work. Much of 2014 for her will be a time where she takes one step forward and two steps “back” before she makes committed decisions to take one giant leap forward. My boots reminded me of how a good foundation can provide a way of trawling through pretty much anything whilst we prepared to take a giant leap in life, or in this case a 16 mile walk with dry feet.

Change sometimes comes unexpected, but often it is expected. Rather than running around the familiar hamster wheel or repeating the same mistakes I am reminded how time for reflection and weaving the events of our lives into stories can keep us energised and motivated to live our lives more truly and more deeply with each passing Autumn.

Thank you R. Whitford for your company and wisdom.

Aveyron, France

Dusk in June – Aveyron, France

It is now almost 6 months since I moved into my own place and out of London. The change has certainly been one that I am not yet totally content with but I continue to see the possibilities and positives whilst discovering and acknowledging my hearts desire. In a way, my own intuitive attempt at embracing the divine within me.

Living alone has given me the opportunity to experience being away from family, from friends and familiarity; away from influence so that I can delve deeper into a space that has eluded me for much of my adult life. A place where truth has buried itself. Though the search continues I feel that something in me is beginning to unravel.

After spending a blissful week long retreat in Aveyron, a sleepy part of France with the beauty of the ages I am on a steady high. Practicing Yoga, meditation, chanting mantra’s and internal prayer has had profound peace. This is the peace which I hope I can nurture as a permanent part of my life. And I have discovered the significance of of deity meditation of the many forms of Shakti, the divine powers of universe which dwell in us all.

I am excited about learning about the goddesses, and learning to invoke their energy in me so that I may achieve the transformation I desire and allow new shoots to grow deep within my every cell, emotion, belief and thought.

I believe that when we’ve searched through many avenues, it is then time to call on the help of a higher power and have faith in its ability to show the way.

I feel this year is a year of big realisations, a year when I will feel the wind of change and adjust the sails of my ship accordingly. I don’t know where the wind will lead me and I don’t exactly know where I am to go. What is inevitable is a desire to be true to my calling, and right now that is to sit, listen, feel, detoxify, release, energise and tune in to my higher Self.

Life in its relationships and activities such as work and hobbies, will continue to be a realm for joy, for expressing love, breaking through limitations of the ego and I will trust in my integrity to lead the way here. Old negative patterns that have been erased will continue to remain in my awareness as “no entry” signs, and I will do whatever it takes to not allow those old patterns to reform.

The wind will ironically take me where my soul longs to be. It is the journey that will be joyful, rich in colour, expressed in  beautiful ways, ways that will I hope touch people in the best way I know how.

As a disciple of my journey, I will be true to the divine within through awareness and passion.




Meeting Life

I was inspired to blog after reading the first two paragraphs of Mastin Kipps entry.

What is it that motivates people to take a course of action?

At a biological level they say it’s anything that creates either fear or pleasure in our personal experience.

Are we always conscious of the decisions we make and the actions we take?

A very few people on this planet will answer yes to this question. Most of us have been conditioned by our life experiences and these conditioned have created habits. Unfortunately not everything that gives us pleasure is good for our wellbeing or in alignment with our definition of success and or our happiness. Further, the course of action we take as a result of the feeling of fear is not always in line with our desires or long term goals.

So why do we make these decisions and take those actions which do not serve our life goals, our happiness or contribute to personal success?

Simply because we are not consciously making these decisions or consciously taking those actions, in other words they have become impulsive behaviours and patterns in the mind and body. We may call these negative.

The key is to become conscious and the first step to become conscious therefore is to acknowledge behaviours, impulses or patterns that do not serve you through gentle observation and awareness of the self. Once you start working on your consciousness you can start to become creative and start making decisions and taking actions which serve your happiness, wellbeing and personal success.

Charles R. Swindoll said that “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it”. By becoming conscious we are able to respond instead of react.

Whether you are somebody who has very ambitious goals or someone who is seeking peace and harmony, having the clarity by being conscious gives you the ledge to stand on and take control of your life.

How can we meet the events of our lives with our best intentions?

  • Decide not to be perfect
  • Be mindful of thoughts, feelings and body sensations
  • Accept what is without judgement
  • Do not hold a negative thought
  • Be curious instead of judgemental
  • What can I appreciate about the situation?
  • What’s right about the situation?
  • What’s good about this?
  • Appreciate what isn’t working to clarify a difficult situation
  • What do I want to have, be or do?
  • How can I use this?
  • What is the one thing I can do right now?
  • Believe in yourself

Thank you 2011 for being good to me. I hope for more joy in 2012 and I hope I can bring more joy to others

Things I appreciated about 2011 or what I look forward to in 2012

  1. My Lifestyle & Experiences
    1. I chose to meditate frequently throughout the 12 months of the year to maintain my sense of gratitude and to keep me centred spiritually. I appreciate the mediation material available on the Internet, the generosity of those who help make it available and the technology through which I am able to access it with such ease.Through developing awareness and compassion, I have opened myself to positive relationships, spontaneity and a zest for life.
    2. I am grateful that I have had the opportunity to have travelled to and enjoyed places abroad and at home;
      1. New York, USA
      2. Washington DC, USA
      3. Pafos, Cyprus
      4. Troodos, Cyprus
      5. Platres, Cyprus
      6. Kyrenia, Cyprus
      7. Ibiza, Spain
      8. Snowdonia, Wales
    3. I am grateful that I have been able to learn about the history and culture of these places through first-hand experience
    4. I am grateful for the opportunities to have enjoyed so much natural beauty this year;
      1. Cycling the Gran Fondo New York
      2. Hiking the ‘Devils Punchbowl, Surrey, Cadre Idris, Snowdonia, Buckinghamshire, around Kent and through to Mount Olympus in the Troodos Mountains.
  2. Friends & Family
    1. I have met new people this year, and I am grateful to have spent good times with them whilst away on hiking trips. Some of these people may even become good friends. I am looking forward to visiting Prague with a few of these people in Easter 2012.
    2. I am grateful I have a better relationship with my family
  3. Love & Romance
    1. I am grateful for having the opportunity to share my good vibes, my love and engage with people who share the same gratitude towards life as I do.
  4. Career
    1. I am grateful that I am employed and have opportunities for progression in the new year
  5. Health
    1. I am grateful for the good health which I continue to enjoy through taking up Yoga, Swimming, Cycling and Hiking. And I am looking forward pursuing optimum health in 2012.

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